Only Child Syndrome?

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OliversArmy's picture
OliversArmy
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Wiki is offline today in protest, EB. 

Daedy did you always want two children or did you just go with the flow?

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OliversArmy wrote:
Daedy did you always want two children or did you just go with the flow?

That's a tough question.

We both knew we wanted children (rather than a single child) so were agreed on that.

But it was a complex decision to stop at two (and neither of us has done anything to make that a permanent decision). Part of me would like a son, but obviously there's no guarantee that a third child would be a boy, and it would be terrible to have a third daughter who in any way felt less wanted than the others.

I do think DW gets a bigger say as it obviously impacts more on her than me. So yeah, it's partly going with the flow, but I'd like to think there's a bit more thought and respect than that seems to imply. Smile

How about you?

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I know OA... I was trying to be funny when I said Wiki was protesting. Or literal, anyway. Its like 'the peasants were revolting' always used to have me in stitches. Um.... *looks ashamed at own nerdery*

I always wanted a big family Daeds... but I ended up with one. Probably just as well really. But that one is the best child in the world, so I can't complain!

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But, you're still young, EB. If the right man came along ... ? What if you met a single man who already had children?

(Obvioously not me, lets make that clear, I'm not flirting, I'm just asking a question!)

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LMAO Daeds!!! Damn and there was me planning the wedding... :X

I was more thinking genetically, it wouldn't be wise. I've got a classically autistic child and I am myself bipolar, both of which have a fairly hefty genetic component so... I would have to think very very carefully about it, lets put it that way. I don' t think it would be terribly responsible, things as they are.

Still, people ARE irresponsible aren't they, when it comes to getting what they want. Remind me of that in 6 years time when I'm pregnant with quads and moaning about my back...

Someone else's children, technically, why not? It wouldn't be a deal breaker. But I don't intend to have any more of my own.

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I read an article recently (sorry, can't remember where) which said that these days, having two children is no longer the norm.  The trend is to have one child, or a big (four or more) family.  I think the idea behind having only one was that children are expensive, and people are apparently deciding to have one child and give it the best that money can buy in terms of education, holidays etc.  Also, women are typically leaving it later to have their first child and may then find that there isn't enough time left to them to have any more.  Can't remember why it said larger families are on the increase.

I do have a friend who stopped at three because although she wanted a fourth, she couldnt afford to privately educate four.  I kind of thought that was a bit sad.

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I wasn't going to have children, I had plans to qualify, see the world both with the navy and then on my own, maybe one day get married, but children were never in my plan ..... 

Hopeful
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Same here Jac though not the navy bit.  Then I had es and swore Id never have any more and for 9 years I didnt.
Eventually after being told I couldnt have any more children (medical issues), dd came along.  Much wanted and longed for.  Then when she was 4 months old we found out I was pregnant with our surprise bundle lol.
We are well and truely finished.

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Yup, much to the disappointment of the MIL I'm quite happy with these two. They're wonderful, but I always think that if DH had been Olly's biological dad I'd have happily stayed with just one. George has been a blessing, truly, but for a not-very-maternal mama, the two of them together push me to the absolute limit. Not in the naughty way, because generally speaking (last week aside) they're not naughty boys, but I don't think parenting comes naturally to me. To push it further would be a pretty big risk to them, and to our marriage. And the very little sanity we both have left. 

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I lost my sanity about January 13th 1992, only I didn't realise it at the time

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