what would you think

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Kismet's picture
Joined: 26/11/2009 - 16:52
Posts: 5919



=)) =)) =)) =)) =)) at OA. That's priceless!

As to the OP - I think you maybe need to occupy your mind more my love, maybe take up a hobby or something?


I just think sexuality is so fluid and personal that to feel jealous and insecure over something as innocuous as porn is akin to deliberatly sabotaging your own happiness, you might as well pluck out a partners eyeballs, because as a reasonably normal 34 year old woman, I can think if more elaborate and disgusting pornographic scenarios just on the sight of andrew McCarthy... The Internet wishes it could be in my mind.

Really, leave the poor guy alone and concentrate on why you feel so insecure, what is lacking in your own self image that you think your oh watching a dirty movie would change his feelings or make him view you differently, because, I've said this before, the real fact is most men wouldn't touch the women in these movies.

JacquiL's picture
Joined: 26/11/2009 - 11:56
Posts: 25845

Totally agree OA, but just have to =)) =)) =)) =)) at your way with words


blondebunny lol!!!

I think maybe we are being a bit blunt here. I can see where you're coming from because I have a similar issue.

I think the problem is not whether or not he WATCHES porn, as you both agree it's wrong. The issue is whether or not he LIKES it, and if he doesn't, why not.

It seems that you think the only reason he doesn't like porn is because it's cheating, NOT because it doesn't turn him on or whatever.

If he doesn't like it, he doesn't like it. Whether or not it is cheating is irrelevant - you don't stop getting turned on by something just because it's wrong.

Maybe he said he didnt know because he's never thought about it? Maybe as far as hes concerned he doesnt like porn, so he doesn't think about possible scenarios where he might like it IYSWIM.

HTH, and big hugs because I know how hard this can be.

Joined: 26/11/2009 - 16:28
Posts: 3373

put this together with your other thread luv,you sound like a very insecure person,and you will lose him if you carry on like that,constantly accuse a person of cheating and they will go do it as they have nothing to lose and get sick of being accused.

Joined: 26/11/2009 - 18:18
Posts: 106

I agree with Shazzersere,

I know someone who used to be like you she use to over analysis situations/conversations and read more into things than there really was. I also saw the effects it had on her relationships, it was souls destroying to watch, as she went out with some lovely guys but the effects of her insecurities and probing and regoing over everything that was said or done ended all of them as it all become too much for the guys, even the most tolerant of them.

I also know how hard it was for her to stop doing what she was doing, she knew what she was like and what she did and what effect it had on her relationships but couldnt help herself.

Sorry not sure if I should have posted here or your other post but just read them both - and you sound so like her, try and get help - my friend did and I can safely say that isnt like that anymore - now if anything comes up she says that she knows she should be worried but she cant be bothered to think about it !!

Good luck you need to get handle on this sooner rather than later for the sake of your relationship and also for you. X