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I feel like some people are willing to just accept 'normality' for their children who could be so much more.
*puts on Devil's Advocate robes*
Perhaps the people who are willing to accept "normality" for their children are those who were themselves brought up to be "normal". Being average is hereditary. So is being pushy.
See? I used the P word. Pushy. Isn't that actually what you are advocating, Tekkani? Pushiness? You're suggesting we should all be a bit more pushy, so that our children achieve a bit more, and don't just trudge along as average bears.
*takes off robes*
I knew I should have looked over the topic again before posting my reply. That'll teach me to answer the phone.
Pushing your child into learning etc doesn't necessarily make you a good parent, neither does letting your child make their own decisions make you an average or bad parent.
Being judgemental is very negative, it certainly isn't something a child should learn, but they do if they see their parent being so.
If a child goes to school and is judgemental then they will soon have problems, children should be taught to embrace evrrything around them, they should embrace the differences in us all, not judge because of those differences
Tekkani, i reckon your parents should have spent a bit more time teaching you maths!
I think it's also worth remembering that parents themselves have different experiences of school and learning and indeed life that colours their parenting, and that learning happens all the time, with or without input, it changes what is being learnt, is all.
I have a long term disability, a couple of years ago I was very poorly and I'll admit it, parenting took a back seat in place of just getting through day to day. When I was a bit better, I'll confess I had to have a big crackdown on behaviour, and that took priority for a while, and we ended up with a long period of time when 'learning' really wasn't a huge priority for either of us. (his independence skills took off though, not sure whether that's a good or bad thing) As a parent you do what you can when you can and if you can, and sometimes you can't.
It doesn't even have to be as extreme as that. For example it's all very well and good having one child and spending that amount of time following up on their interests and teaching them, it becomes a whole 'nother game when you have five little dears all needing feeding and changing and washing and so on (I have one child, and there I'm sticking!!!) Add a child with a disability to the mix, or a parent on their own, or two parents who both have to work and I can quite see how focused learning of the kind you describe takes a back seat.
You say you won't "allow" your daughter to be average. How do you plan to prevent that? What if she's not super-bright? What if she's only capable of "average" intelligence? Will you push her even harder and show her that her best may not be good enough?
I want my children to be bright, to go to University, to achieve great things. But I refuse to tell them that their best isn't enough. If they work hard I'll be the proudest mother ever known, regardless of results or grades.
=D> =D> =D> OA
Not everyone judges. You parent your way, I don't judge you for that. I don't agree with it, I certainly wouldn't choose to parent that way, but ultimately I don't care how anyone else parents their child, only how well I feel I'm doing with mine. So no, not everyone judges. Perhaps that's something judgemental people tell themselves to make it more socially acceptable that they behave in such a way?
Point 3 of your last post is totally at odds with your previous post stating you won't allow her to be average. I can't quite work that out.