I think it's fair to say that as a new poster you're rather at a disadvantage(not judging you, we were all new some time, just explaining) it's very difficult to know how to take new members that- oh gosh, i'm not sure how to phrase this- assume a moral high ground or a point of superiority I guess. I think that's where the sensitivity comes in.
Hopefully you'll stick around Tekkani, and we'll get to know you as a more rounded person who regularly tears their hear out as well as thinks they get some things spot on. Daedy will be pleased to have another man about the place I think!
Oh thank goodness for the lack of simples! =))
I went to see my DD's head, about something totally unrelated to her.
However I came out of that meeting feeling 10 feet tall, she said my DD was a credit to me, she has never seen a child so enthusiastic about everything or so empathetic. She also said she bets she goes into something like teaching. I mentioned this topic to her and she said that IHO supportive parents get more than those that push their children too much as children of very pushy parents rebel usually just before exams
For what its worth, I LOVE it when a new poster turns up with very strong opinions and the courage to express them. I don't actually care if their views are diametrically opposite to mine, I just like having a good debate!
Oi! I gave you a kebab earlier, where's the love, man?
I like new posters too, i'm just trying to explain where any sensitivity may be coming from. Poorly, i know!
It's not that poor, I get it. A little bit of welcome does go a long way, so thanks
And are you SURE you want to get to know me a bit more? I don't get more mellow with age...
I find some of your comments condescending. It's not a big deal, I just think that you could phrase things differently. It feels that you only want to listen to comments agreeing with you, which is inappropriate for an open forum.
For what it's worth, I don't disagree with your early point about some parents shirking their responsibilities towards education; it's wrong. But to judge other parents because they don't parent your way, that's going to get backs up. It's not being touchy, it's having respect for another person's opinion.
I like new posters too! AND I like his opinions. I honestly can't see any condescension - unless I'm being blind and naive - There is no personal attack on anyone on this forum, or how they parent.
All I can see is someone saying - there is nothing wrong with average. There is everything wrong with aiming for average if there is nothing in the way to stop them achieving more. If a child ultimately achieves 'average' thats absolutely fine - provided they are given every opportunity to grasp more than that. It's not about ultimate achievements, it's about how they are supported to be the best they can be, in whatever way suits them.
I can also only see someone who is confident and happy to encourage their child alongside the education system - instead of letting the education system do it all for them - again something which nobody on these forums does afaik : ) - everybody I've met on here, supports 'education' however it's presented, and wants the absolute best for their children.
sorry for any offence that may have been offered in this post - it's unintentional
Oh, and in my quick posting, I forgot the cardinal sin: 'it's not the winning, it's the taking part'. What rubbish - if it isn't the winning, why take part in a competitive event?!?!? If it's the taking part which is fun, run round the block with your friends. Competitions are there to win.
Yeah, flack shields on for that one.
Yeah, flack shields on for that one.
i find that particular phrase annoying too, BUT in order to be a winner at a high level in any competitive sport, you have to lose and fail many many many times over the years you are working your way up... i have experiece both as a player and a coach in competitive sport, and kids who get discouraged easily because they didn't win/score a goal/etc are not going to get to the top, they're not going to stick at the sport long enough. Kids need to learn how to be good winners and good losers and to be able to evaluate their performance and see what they need to work on to improve, whether they win or lose (resting on your laurels is as bad as accepting defeat as inevitable). They need the help of good coaches and encouraging parents to do that, and lots of opportunity to practice at home/in the park/etc. While I wouldn't phrase it as "it's not the winning, it's the taking part" I would still praise kids massively who competed very well and still lost. The "failure is feedback" talk about how they can improve for next time can come later (the next training session is a good time). You can get them to look at their own skills, how they worked as a team (if it's a team sport), what the oponents did well and so on, and keep on encouraging them to practice practice and more practice.
Kids who are just taking part in a competition for the fun and/or experience when it's not their sport are competing for the taking part, and if they had fun and lost, then great. Taking part is an end in itself, especially if someone is a relative beginner in a tough competition. Having fun underpins success in any sport, "if it's not fun it's not worth doing" is a very good mantra for sport. Winning may be the aim and it's the icing on the cake, but if you don't enjoy playing then what is winning worth? What's icing with no cake*....? It's the fun of taking part, and of training and constantly improving and facing new challenges that carry kids through all the hard work needed to be really good and successful. And some kids don't want to play at a high level but they do want to play just for fun. And some adults too. That's why you get recreational teams/clubs as well as competitive ones, and why people sometimes play sport and don't bother to keep score.
*someone mentioned earlier in the thread that we hadn't talked about cake yet... well we have now lol
Pretty much agreed.
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